About the vision board...

Michael Beckwith acknowledges 'secondaries', those pesky beliefs and decisions we make about life, money, our bodies, health, relationships, anything and everything around our personal experiences. He didn't say what to do with them except work twenty minutes every morning and twenty minutes every night, using your vision board to create a new focus.

The argument is this. If you still have 'secondary' beliefs around, let's say, relationships, and you visualize yourself in the arms of a lover, happy and satisfied, and you have beliefs about, the opposite sex, or love, or marriage that contradict your new plan, those beliefs will exert themselves and draw to you the kind of person who will be the perfect mirror of those beliefs.

Say, for instance. You read a little bit about my childhood in a previous post. My father suffered from a mood disorder that he medicated with alcohol. Of his five siblings, two are alcoholic. He had moments of violent rage, on occasion I was on the receiving end of that. I also had an uncle who liked little girls, if you know what I mean. My older sisters were quite vicious in their teasing when I was a small and anything they could do to make me cry was fair play, inluding their favorite game. "You were adopted. Nobody loves you. They only keep you because they feel sorry for you." "You have a dimple on your chin, that means you're the devil." If a three year old is told that repeatedly, to the point of hysterical crying, you'd think a mother might step in. Not my mother. Not unless the crying got too loud. My mother was and is codependent. She wears rose colored glasses and always sees the glass full to over-flowing. She lives in a state of denial about all things uncomfortable. She was raised by two alcoholics. Although she doesn't abuse alcohol, her two siblings nearly died from it. From that scenario one could make decisions about not being safe in relationships. For instance, during a fearful experience, a beating, a child might decide that life is scary, or life isn't safe, or men are abusive, or "I must be evil." or "I hate me." or "I'll never get married." and/or "I hate men." "Men are violent." "Women are stupid and helpless"... One violent incident could cause a child to create a mulitude of decisions that become beliefs over a period of repeated evidence.

So, there you are, creating the perfect love. He arrives and you are so happy. You've never been happier in your life. He's sexy, he's handsome, he's smart, he's all the things you were asking for, consciously. After nine months or so you begin to see things in him, a temper, odd sexual requests, addictive behavior towards alcohol or other things. How could that happen? You were sure when you were using your vision board that you didn't want any of that old stuff. You visualized someone smart and wonderful, right? Well, he is smart and wonderful and also very screwed up. His mother abandoned him when he was still in diapers, his grandmother raised him with a yard stick. His father was and is a rage-aholic. When he went back to live with his mother and her new husband, they were sexually inappropriate around him. He was molested by an uncle..... All of your beliefs about men are created in one man. You have an opportunity to look at the mirror of those beliefs and heal them. Delete them. Dis-create them. But, oh no, now you're stuck in a relationship with your worst nightmare and once again, your beliefs are validated...unless....you own up to what you really believe about men/women/relationships and heal it.

To dis-create a belief takes some practice. If you have a belief that women are liars and you are looking to fall in love with a woman, you use your vision board that has a picture of a couple walking hand in hand down a beach at sunset. You want that to be you. Yet, you have a history of relationships where your partner has cheated on you and lied about it. Be honest with your history of relationships. If you have a pattern going on, one liar after another, you need to own up to your beliefs and decisions that are drawing them to you. Not all women are liars. Not all women are cheaters. Not all men are violent.

So, what beliefs do you have about relationships? What beliefs do you have about men or women or money. It doesn't grow on trees you know.

There are several techniques to delete old outmoded beliefs and decisions. Find a healer, an Avatar Master, a PLA Class, a hypno-therapist with experience and get going. Life is too short to carry around the past experiences only to recreate them in the future.

Remember, it's not enough to say, "I am in love with a wonderful, healthy woman, ...and she doesn't lie and cheat." That affirmation is a negative. See your vision in detail, say the affirmation in the present tense, and positive. If a secondary belief exerts itself....delete it. That's the part for which you may need assistance and practice.