It's all in the phrasing.

Affirmations are a powerful tool to use to get your head out of habitual thinking patterns. However, the phrasing of such needs to be precise and positive, and present tense. I've heard affirmations that went on and on and I wondered how in the world a person could remember it all.

Keep it simple. Keep it positive.

I am radiant health.
I am Source.
I am happy to be me.

Here's one I used to use: "The love and power of God flows through me and draws to me all that I need to make my life happy and complete."

"The Law of Abundance is acting in my life now."

"I am joyful, peaceful, and loving."

"My relationships grow in intimacy and honesty."

"I feel beautiful and sexy."

When your monkey brain goes off on a tangent about the El Pollo Loco cashier or the rudeness of people in service positions....(as does my little monkey brain from time to time) reel yourself back to the position and experience you prefer.

Take ten deep and fast deep breaths to energize your body with the statements of your affirmations. Ten deep breaths and "I am loving and accepting." or "I am peaceful and present." Say the affirmation a few times and feel the words soak into every cell until you experience the meaning of them.

My El Pollo experience last Sunday was a test of my patience. I was picking up picnic food for our gathering at the beach concert. By the way, next Sunday is a Doors tribute band that is outstanding and because it is the last concert of the season, there will be a fireworks display afterwards.

Back to my test. I pulled up behind a car in the drive-thru and another car pulled in behind me. We all sat there for ten minutes without moving an inch. I finally turned off my engine and began the monkey brain dialog. "Shit! I'm going to be late. There won't be any place to park and I'm going to have to carry my chair and blankets and basket for miles. What the hell is taking so long?" Blah blah blah. I was tempted to honk my horn, as if that would do any good. I was all worked up. By the time I rolled forward to the speaker to order I was all riled up. So I said, "It's taking a long time. Is everthing okay in there?" She said they had a system problem but it was being taken care of then asked for my order. She didn't say she was sorry for the delay, just wanted to get things ordered to move on. I ordered chicken, lots of chicken and a chocolate shake. Then sat for another ten minutes. Finally when I got to the window, I paid the girl and she handed me my bag of chicken and a shake. There was no apology for the long wait and, frankly, her attitude seemed that she and her friends were having fun and it didn't matter what was going on with the customers. I drove away and took a sip of the shake. It was vanilla. I hate vanilla. I turned the car around, parked it, and went inside. Instead of breathing deeply and calming myself, I handed another girl the container and said, "This is supposed to be chocolate, it's vanilla." She said, "We're out of chocolate."

I said, why didn't she tell me that when I ordered it?"

She said, "She didn't know we were out."

Now my voice became loud enough for the entire staff in the kitchen to hear me. "When I got to the window she should have said, 'we're out of chocolate would you like vanilla?' Instead of just handing out a vanilla in hopes I wouldn't notice? That nuts. Do you get that?" I looked at the staff of girls, nobody over 20 years old, and they had nothing to say. They stood there frozen. Here's the kicker.

"Would you like your money back?"

"What do you think?"

It took three of them to figure out how to give me my money back.

This scenario is a recurrent one for me. I don't know about you, but my experience is that good customer service has fallen the way of the hula hoop. You just don't see it anymore.

So, if it is a recurrent experience for me, what is the mirror? Yes, folks, that's the question I have to ask myself when I get into a snit. What's the mirror? Otherwise it wouldn't continue to appear in my reality and it wouldn't have been such an angry making scene.

The drive back to the beach gave me the opportunity to figure it out. I had to look back at the service I gave in my years as a food server and there it was. I got fired from a job for giving such poor service. I was embarrassed to admit it to anyone. I was always showing up late and had an attitude. There's the mirror. I lied about it to friends and family because I felt ashamed of the job I did. I kept that a secret. That was 32 years ago and the shadow of it keeps falling across my path to give me the opportunity to bring the truth into the light and forgive myself. It's much easier, or so it would seem, to continue to bitch and complain about the young, thoughtless servers than to look in the mirror. I could bitch and complain making me feel like I'm better, smarter, whatever.

In the ten minute drive to the beach I went from pissed to pleasant because I was willing to look in the mirror and forgive myself.

"I am willing and ready to see the truth of who I am." (even if the truth hurts)

"I grow and expand my awareness in every experience."

"I am a spiritual warrior."