Aging Parents

My mother is a soft spoken woman. She never cusses. Well, she used to when she was sewing five little girl dresses for Easter. I heard her say, "Shit!" more than once as she ripped out a seam that was on the wrong side. But since she gave up sewing, her four letter words are safe enough to have her around the grandkids, that is, until yesterday. I was shocked at her response when I said, "Mom, it may be time for you to stop driving."
Her response? "Bulllshit!" I swear. My 86 year-old mother responded like a seasoned sailor.

The DMV is asking her to take a written and a behind-the-wheel test before her next birthday in June. I pray they take her license. The other day she was sitting at a red light waiting to make a left-hand turn. As soon as the light turned green she turned. Her passengers screamed. She said, "I had the green light." (Nevermind the oncoming traffic.)

Yesterday she asked the handyman to look at her bedroom window. She thought something was wrong with it because she couldn't open it. It's only a few years old and works great. She's been opening it and closing it for at least three years. He and I both took a look and it opened right up. I think she forgot how.

It's so sad to see my competent mother lose her grip. She raised six children, worked, kept house, took care of my father, and made her decisions quickly and with clarity. My four sisters and I are having to come together to decide what to do if the DMV lets her keep her license. She and I own property together. I'd have to take her off the title to protect my investment in the event of an accident. It will be hard to tell her this or to get her to agree.

Most of my friends have lost both of their parents. Some of them had to suffer with their dementia and diseases but I've been lucky. My mother is healthy and strong and still drives herself to work every morning. However, I'm paying off her car next week and I'm hoping she will retire, finally. Her sister still works and drives even though she has glaucoma. It's crazy. I think my mother is in denial about her age and her capabilities. Maybe I will be as well when I reach that age. I hope I have the sense to let it go when the time comes.

Honor your mother and father. Love them and take care of them. Even when it's making you nuts.